On the Rocks Page 6

  He was about to get out of the car, and Dinal was walking towards us. I was starting to tremble where I sat, and I looked down so that our eyes wouldn’t meet. I knew that he knew who I was, but I didn’t want to bring any more attention to myself. If I could get him to leave me alone and pretend I wasn’t here, that would be the best thing.

  “Nothing, can we just please just get out of here? I will do anything, stay at any nasty place you want me to if you will take me away from here right now. I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this anymore, Jack. Please.”

  “It is going to be fine, Tommy. I had to bring you here. This is where we were supposed to go if the threat got too high. Here I can keep you safe, and there is a panic room, as well as a basement that would withstand the house being burned down. This is the safest place for you right now, Tommy, and I think your father was right to choose such a place.”

  I wanted to argue with him further, but Jack was getting out of the car and shaking hands with Dinal. I saw the smile on his face as he looked me over, and he made a crude comment about Nick’s daughter being back on the premise. I didn’t know how to respond, I never did, so I just put my head down and started walking towards the house, trying my best not to hear any more of the cruel words that would come out of his mouth.

  The man gave me the creeps and I was actually shivering when I got in. It had nothing to do with the crispness of the air outside, but memories that I couldn’t shake, no matter how badly I wanted to. There was nothing else that I would have liked to have done better than to forget everything about Dinal and the safe house.

  Jack caught up to me and pulled me into a bedroom in the back. “Look, Tommy, Dinal says that we have to stay in here together for the time being. Your father is recalling many of the men who work for him back to the safe house this evening, and it is going to be full soon.”

  “If there is someone trying to take us all out, wouldn’t it be the worst thing we could do, being all together under one roof?”

  Jack just shook his head and nodded. I could tell that he didn’t really like the idea either. It gave me hope that I would be able to figure something out. I didn’t know what, but I knew that I was going to have to talk him into getting me out of here. My skin was crawling, and with more of the family coming back to roost, there was literally nowhere else that I would rather be than as far away from that house as possible right now.

  “While I don’t like the idea of us all being here together for more reasons than one, your dad is the boss, and he wants you here. If I thought you were in danger, I would take you away right now, but I don’t believe that you are. I believe that…”

  “Yeah, I know, this is the safest place. I just want to go, please Jack.” I hated the smallness of my voice and that I felt compelled to have to beg. I didn’t want to have to sound or act this way. I wanted him to understand that I didn’t want to be here and to just take it at that. Why did I have to explain myself when it was obviously too painful to repeat out loud? Why couldn’t he just see my pain and take me at my word?

  “Why are you shaking, Tommy? Tell me what is going on.”

  “I don’t know what to say, Jack. I just want to get out of here. Can’t that be enough? Why do I have to explain myself to you or anyone else?”

  Jack nodded his head like he understood and went to the door by the far wall. He locked it and turned towards me. “You are going to tell me what is going on. I need to know, if for no other reason than to keep you safe.”

  Chapter 12

  Jack

  There was definitely something going on with Tommy. Ever since I had mentioned that we were going to the safe house, he had been acting funny and now it was just worse. I didn’t get it. He was acting like I just took him to a torture chamber. There was a lot I didn’t understand about Tommy, but I did want to understand him now. He was acting strange for a reason, and I wanted to know why. Something told me that I needed to know why.

  When I turned around after locking the door, he tried to start flirting, getting my mind off the subject, but I wasn’t going to let him get away with it. I knew that he was just covering something up, and I wanted to know what it was that he was trying to hide. It didn’t make sense how he was acting, and I had to understand more.

  “What are you doing?”

  “You are going to tell me what is going on, Tommy, and we are not going to leave this room until you do. Just tell me what has you so freaked out and then I can help you. I want to help you.”

  The young man just shook his head, and I moved to the side of the bed and sat down. I was close, but not too close to him. I wanted him to see that everything was going to be okay. Tommy was always so boisterous and loud, but now he was acting scared, and I disliked that even more than anything else. The last thing I wanted for him was to be afraid. I was here to keep him safe. I wasn’t going to let anything happen to him.

  “I really don’t want to talk about it, Jack. It’s just that there are too many bad memories.”

  “Well you are going to have to tell me because I was serious when I said I am not leaving this room until you do and neither are you. As soon as you found out we were coming here, you were acting weird and when we pulled up, you were shaking. There has to be something going on here.”

  “I just… It’s no big deal.”

  “It is, Tommy. You have done nothing but run your mouth since I met you. Something now has you clamming up like this. I want to know what it is. I can’t help you unless you tell me.”

  Tommy still didn’t want to divulge anything, but I had a feeling that another part of him did. I had questioned enough perps and victims in my life to know that he was the latter. He wanted to get his story out, and I just had to give him the ability to do so. We had nothing but time at this point and since I wasn’t too enthused to go out there and mingle with who was on site anyways, I would have much rather talked to Tommy. He was hard to deal with, but I was starting to understand him a little better. How normal could he be with a mob boss father that raised him? Add in the fact that he is gay, and life couldn’t have been too easy.

  “You can’t help me, Jack. That is the problem, no one can. The only thing that is going to help me is if my father and all his cronies like Dinal just disappeared off of the face of the earth. That is the only thing that is going to help me sleep at night.”

  “It seems to be what is happening, though you should watch what you wish for. They are going to lump you in with them because you are an heir.”

  “I guess so, but it would be worth it to never see them again. The universe should start with Dinal”

  “Who is Dinal?”

  “That tall man you met outside and were talking to. That’s Dinal. He has been with my father almost as long as Tony has, but he came into the family as a kid. My dad raised him the way he tried to raise me. Dinal stuck with it, and he is now just as dangerous and cruel as my dad is.”

  “I met Tony the other day. Is he a bad guy too? I didn’t feel that from him, but I guess my senses aren’t what they used to be.”

  Tommy shrugged, “Tony isn’t like all of the rest of them. He is literally the only one who works for my dad that I like. He is different, but it is hard to explain how. He is just as dangerous and cruel when he needs to be. I have heard stories about Tony that have kept me up at night, but I never got a bad feeling from him.”

  “So, what is so bad about Dinal?”

  He turned away and wouldn’t meet my gaze.

  “Well you know I am gay, right?”

  I chuckled and nodded my head that I did. It would have been hard not to know that. Tommy might as well have held a sign up about his sexual preference.

  “You don’t seem too worried about keeping that information under wraps.”

  “I wasn’t always this way, and it is only when I realized that I was going to be hated either way that I cared enough to just say how I felt. I don’t act that way around certain guys though. Most of the guys that work for my dad kn
ow that I am gay, but I can’t ever say so definitively one way or another that I am.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because my dad doesn’t want everyone to know that his pride and joy is a fag. His words, not mine.”

  I sat back on the bed, and I didn’t know what to say. It made sense, and I would have guessed that Nick would take that stance on it. There was a reason that I didn’t make my own sexuality known. To men like this, it would be seen as a weakness at the very least. For him to grow up with it, I can only imagine how hard it must have been to keep it all in. Maybe that was why he was so boisterous now.

  “When I first met you, you were very open about it.”

  “I knew who you were, and I wanted to see what kind of guy I was working with. Besides, I spent enough of my time pretending to be someone that I am not. I don’t want to do that anymore, so I am just not going to. I refuse to hide anymore.”

  “So then why are we in here?”

  “Because I already know what Dinal will do to me. I don’t want to get on his bad side. He is even worse than Dad when it comes to the gay thing. I think most of the guys who work for the family are homophobic. They think it is some kind of disease, and they are going to catch it. It’s ridiculous, but it doesn’t change anything. They all hate me, and Dinal hates me the most.”

  “What did he do to you?”

  Tommy looked down again, staring at his fingers that were moving around in his lap. He was nervous, that much was obvious, but I didn’t understand why. There was more to the story, and it was one that he was holding onto for dear life.

  “He used to beat the crap out of me. My mom wouldn’t let my dad touch me, never, but Dinal would do it for him. That is why I hate Dinal so much. He has been abusing me since I was a kid. He told my dad not to worry, that he was going to beat the gay out of me.”

  I felt horrible for Tommy. I was starting to see why he was a loud mouth kid. He had so much more to him and the more I tried to put myself in his shoes, the more I realized that it was tough for him. His outer shell was there to keep him safe, and I was sure that it was a necessity for someone like him. With everything that he had to deal with, it was no wonder that he showed out. It was better than him being cowed. For some reason, I hated the idea of someone breaking his spirit. It made me not only understand him better, but to also be thankful that he was so feisty. Tommy needed to be.

  “He isn’t going to touch you while I am around, Tommy. I promise you that.”

  “I know that, Jack, but you are only temporary. If I knew that I could get away from these guys, I wouldn’t have to go to such lengths…”

  He stopped, and I waited for Tommy to say more, but his lips shut and didn’t reopen. I wasn’t sure if I should push for more or what I should do, but I knew that I didn’t want to leave it like it was.

  “You know, I still hide who I am. The world isn’t quite ready for it yet, not all of it anyways Tommy. You need to learn to tone it down a little bit. That would help you more than anything.”

  He frowned at me, and I had a feeling that he had heard it all before.

  “I don’t want to pretend that I am something that I am not. I am gay. It is the twenty-first century, and it shouldn’t be a crime anymore. But it is in my family. As soon as I came out, my dad never looked at me the same again. My mother has accepted me as I am, but I don’t think Nick ever will.”

  I had felt the same way a long time ago, and I can say that it wasn’t the best feeling in the world. I could tell that Tommy was still in the throes of it, while I had made peace with it a long time ago. I wanted to help him, but I didn’t know a way. He was right when he said that I was just here temporarily. When this is all over, I doubt I will see Tommy again. I wanted to help, but how? Nick and his like were not men to mess with or to meddle in their lives.

  “It’s going to be okay, Tommy.”

  He chuckled and shook his head. “No, it’s not going to be okay, Jack, but I am going to make it okay. One way or another.”

  I could tell he was emotional, and all I could think to do was hug him. He looked like he needed a hug and when I felt his body start to convulse, I knew that he was holding in tears. I told him to just let it out. Sometimes that was all we could do for someone. Tommy had a lot to get out, and I wanted to be there to help him in the only capacity that I knew at the moment.

  After a time, his tears and anguish subsided, and I lay down with him on the bed. The door was still locked, and I knew that it wouldn’t have been wise to get caught as we were, but there was nothing to be done. Tommy needed me, and at that minute, I needed him as well. We were both in a world that was harsh and didn’t want us in it. I vowed to myself there and then that I was going to make sure that I was able to help Tommy. Nothing was going to happen to him. I wasn’t going to let it happen.

  I ignored the reaction of my body to the slim man tucked underneath my arm, sleeping with his head on my shoulders. I was feeling drawn to Tommy in so many ways, but this wasn’t the right time. He was vulnerable, and I shouldn’t take advantage of it, no matter how tempting it really was to have his soft slim body nestled up against mine in such an intimate way.

  Chapter 13

  Tommy

  I woke up a little groggy and I could tell that it was still daylight outside. I don’t know why, but it took a minute for me to remember where I was or why I felt so damn down all of a sudden. Jack had made me spill some of my secrets, and I can’t say that I liked the feeling. I feel vulnerable, even though he was lying next to me, holding me like he was never going to let me go. I wanted him in my bed, but this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.

  I should have woken him up. I was starving, and my stomach was rumbling, but I didn’t want to break the moment. He felt good snuggled up beside me, and I didn’t want to get rid of the feeling. I wanted him badly, and if this was all I was going to get right now, I was going to milk it for all it was worth.

  Jack’s body was hard underneath my head, and I knew that his chest was just as hard. My hand lay over his chest and when I tried to move it, he made a sound and pulled me closer to him. It was hard not to react to the body next to mine, even if it was the wrong time to feel anything. I wanted to snuggle closer and have him never let me go. In that moment, I felt safe for once, and I didn’t want the feeling to ever end.

  He smelled so good, a mix of cologne and something manly that really had no name. It was just how he smelled, and I don’t know how many times I had enjoyed the musk of a man. We hadn’t taken a shower this morning, didn’t have time, and our bodies had made it hot enough to sweat. I was thinking about taking a shower with him, but then I remembered where I was and who I was around. While the door was locked, and we were in the room together, it felt like we were insulated from all the chaos of my world. I didn’t want to think about anything. I just wanted to think about me and Jack.

  “How long have you been up?”

  His voice startled me, and I jumped a little bit, which in turn made him chuckle at me. “I didn’t mean to scare you, Tommy. You just looked so deep in thought. What are you thinking about?”

  He was ready to have another heart to heart, but I wasn’t. I didn’t want to talk about anything upsetting. I felt emotionally drained and wasn’t ready to give anymore.

  “I was thinking that I am starving and how great it would be to get out of here for a little while and grab something. There is a diner not far from where we went off the road. Maybe we can go there and grab something? I just want to get out of here for a little while, Jack, and I have a feeling that you aren’t going to be the best cook.”

  “I’m not, and I am hungry as well. Maybe we can take a little time and get away for a little while.”

  I agreed. I didn’t want to be here any longer than I had to be, and if there was a way for me to get out of it, I was all for it. Something bad was going to happen. I could feel it, and I wanted to get Jack and me as far away as I could. I was just going to have to make him stay out for anoth
er reason once we were done with dinner. I could only stretch out a meal for so long, but my mind was firing with all kinds of substitute activities.

  “Let me take a shower first, and then I will be ready to go. I have a few changes of clothes from when I had to stay here before. It will just have to do.”

  Jack agreed, and I finally peeled myself away from him. I didn’t want to, not really, but I knew that I had to. The moment of intimacy was gone, and it was all I could do to not pull him to me and kiss him like I wanted to so badly. I was still very much attracted to him, maybe even more so now, but I didn’t want to make it weird between us again. I liked this new vibe much better.

  “You go get ready, and I will get ready in here. I don’t need that long. Just don’t dash off on me again.”

  I assured him that I wouldn’t, and I made my way to bathroom that wasn’t far from the bedroom. As soon as I was out of the room and away from Jack, I started to have the same panicked feelings that I had before. I was too afraid of running into someone that I kept my head down and made my way there as fast as I could. I was worried about being around Dinal. I knew that he was going to make my life a living hell if I allowed it or if he caught me alone. I didn’t want that to happen, but I was not going to run back to Jack. At some point I was going to have to stand up to him.

  Making it to bathroom without incident was enough to get my heart to stop pounding in my chest. I had been so worried about Dinal that I almost didn’t believe that I hadn’t run into him yet. I remember when I was younger, the old man would always pop up somewhere where it was just the two of us, and no matter how badly I would want to avoid him, he made sure that it was impossible.

  Now I was in the bathroom, and another locked door made me feel a little bit better. I got undressed and started the shower. My mind had first been on Jack and his hard body that I woke up laying on, but then it was quickly consumed by Dinal and the fear that I was going to find myself alone with him again. I had seen the look in his eyes when we had first pulled up. It was almost a grin of delight, but it wasn’t because he was happy to see me. No, it was because he was happy to have another opportunity to make my life a living hell.